[D]Motivated

Moving

2011-11-21T09:23:00.000-05:00

Our actual site is finally up over at dmotivated.com. Be sure to go over and check it out. As for the blogroll, we will be migrating all of the pictures and jokes over to the site. The blog will probably just become the musings of the site's administrator. It probably won't be updated that often, but we're sure you'll find plenty to amuse yourself.

Subway

2011-03-06T11:54:00.000-05:00

Therapy

2011-03-06T11:53:00.000-05:00

Suzie and the peanut

2011-03-06T11:51:00.000-05:00

Little Susie came home from school with a smile on her face & told her mom,
"Frankie showed me his weenie today at the playground."
Before her mom could say a word Susie went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut."
Relaxing with a smile, Susies mom asked, "Really small was it?"
Susie said, "No, salty."
Her mom fainted.

Sir Ulric

2011-03-06T11:36:00.002-05:00

I don't know

2011-03-06T11:34:00.000-05:00

Many faces of yoda

2011-03-06T11:32:00.000-05:00

Dad said no

2011-03-06T11:30:00.002-05:00

Despair

2011-03-06T11:29:00.002-05:00

Darwin's hopscotch

2011-03-06T11:28:00.000-05:00

Colouring

2011-03-06T11:27:00.000-05:00

Welcome to the Apple store

2011-03-06T11:26:00.000-05:00

American Barbie

2011-03-06T11:24:00.000-05:00

Ultimate Facebook Thug!

2011-03-06T10:47:00.000-05:00

How many Xzibts would Xzibit exhibit?

2011-03-06T10:46:00.000-05:00

Folding your arms...

2011-03-06T10:43:00.000-05:00

Don't be sexist!

2011-03-06T10:40:00.001-05:00

Marriage

2011-01-02T14:26:00.002-05:00

Get To Work.

2011-01-02T14:25:00.004-05:00

Retards

2011-01-02T14:25:00.001-05:00

Life

2011-01-02T14:24:00.000-05:00

Always Pay Attention!

2011-01-02T14:22:00.000-05:00

They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them: “In medicine, it is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor. The first is That you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body.” For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth.

”Go ahead and do the same thing,” he told his students.

The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it.

When everyone had finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, “The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my Middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention.”

Delusion

2011-01-02T14:17:00.002-05:00

Douchebags

2011-01-02T14:16:00.002-05:00

Every Child Needs One

2011-01-02T14:15:00.002-05:00

Cash4Gold.com

2011-01-02T14:14:00.000-05:00

Admit It.

2011-01-02T14:12:00.000-05:00

PC or Mac?

2011-01-02T14:11:00.002-05:00

Challenges

2011-01-02T14:10:00.002-05:00

The Real Bat-Man.

2011-01-02T14:09:00.000-05:00

It's That Simple!

2011-01-02T14:08:00.000-05:00

Wud up Tigga?

2011-01-02T14:07:00.000-05:00

What Really Happens in Andy's Room.

2011-01-02T14:06:00.000-05:00

Abuse of Motivator.

2011-01-02T14:05:00.000-05:00

The Truth About Dora the Explorer.

2011-01-02T14:02:00.000-05:00

Deception

2010-09-20T21:56:00.000-04:00

Guitar hero

2010-09-20T21:55:00.001-04:00

Bud Light

2010-09-20T21:54:00.002-04:00

Poor cockroach

2010-09-20T21:53:00.002-04:00

A little boy killed a butterfly. His dad said to him: " no butter for two weeks".
He then killed a honey bee. His dad said: "no honey for two weeks either".
Later the little boy's mum was in the garden when she stood on a cockroach.
The little boy looked at his dad and said:
"Do you want to tell her or shall I ?"

And on that day.....

2010-09-20T21:52:00.002-04:00

Photographic opportunity

2010-09-20T21:52:00.000-04:00

Honda racing

2010-09-20T21:50:00.001-04:00

Great costume

2010-09-20T21:49:00.003-04:00

Your kids first car

2010-09-20T21:49:00.001-04:00

Did you forget something buddy?

2010-09-20T21:48:00.001-04:00

Bad respawn

2010-09-20T21:47:00.001-04:00

Winnie the personality disorder

2010-09-20T21:46:00.000-04:00

Christianity

2010-09-20T21:44:00.003-04:00

Bratz

2010-09-20T21:44:00.000-04:00

Caturday

2010-09-20T21:38:00.002-04:00

A-10's

2010-09-20T21:37:00.002-04:00

Saving your own ass first

2010-09-20T21:36:00.002-04:00

Fuck It

2010-09-20T21:35:00.001-04:00

Tired bicycle

2010-09-20T21:34:00.001-04:00

Internet Explorer

2010-09-20T21:33:00.002-04:00

The man from tomorrow

2010-09-20T21:31:00.005-04:00

Ha ha, you thought I was a shark

2010-09-20T21:31:00.004-04:00

The rails belong UNDER the roller-coaster car

2010-09-20T21:30:00.000-04:00

Firefox has frozen

2010-08-28T16:39:00.002-04:00

Hey

2010-08-28T16:38:00.002-04:00

A long lonely train ride

2010-08-28T16:37:00.000-04:00

A man and a woman who had never met before, but were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly... he in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned over and gently woke the woman saying:
"Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
Good," she replied. "Get your own fucking blanket."
After a moment of silence, he farted.

Yes Vin, we know....

2010-08-28T16:35:00.002-04:00

Lost Dog

2010-08-28T16:34:00.003-04:00

Douche-tags

2010-08-28T16:34:00.000-04:00

Mommy shocker

2010-08-28T16:33:00.000-04:00

Gingerbread Porn

2010-08-28T16:31:00.002-04:00

Christian Disposal

2010-08-28T16:30:00.002-04:00

Booty

2010-08-28T16:29:00.003-04:00

The Internet

2010-08-28T16:29:00.000-04:00

Point-blank bazooka

2010-08-28T16:28:00.000-04:00

Swallowing your gum

2010-08-28T16:27:00.000-04:00

Bad Luck

2010-08-28T16:26:00.000-04:00

Barney Fife

2010-08-28T16:25:00.000-04:00

A dance to remember

2010-08-28T16:24:00.000-04:00

Dollar buildings

2010-08-28T16:23:00.000-04:00

There is hope for geeks after all

2010-08-28T16:22:00.000-04:00

Kimmy K

2010-08-01T11:51:00.001-04:00

Not really [D]Motivational, but still.......DAMN!!!!

Apparently Nothing

2010-08-01T11:44:00.000-04:00

Determination

2010-08-01T11:42:00.000-04:00

Desperation

2010-08-01T11:40:00.000-04:00

9 Deadly Words Used by Women

2010-08-01T11:38:00.000-04:00

1. Fine
     This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes
     If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing
     This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4. Go Ahead
     This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5. Loud Sigh
     This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That's Okay
     This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks
     A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - this is true, unless she says "thank's a lot" - that is pure sarcasim and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a 'whatever'.)

8. Whatever
     Is a woman's way of saying F-YOU!

9. Don't worry about it, I got it.
     Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response, refer to #3.

Spy School

2010-08-01T11:27:00.002-04:00

New Crib

2010-08-01T11:26:00.002-04:00

Jealousy

2010-08-01T11:25:00.000-04:00

Cow Bell

2010-08-01T11:24:00.000-04:00

Body Slam

2010-08-01T11:22:00.002-04:00

Courage

2010-08-01T11:21:00.000-04:00

Men on Advice

2010-08-01T11:18:00.000-04:00

Hey

2010-08-01T11:15:00.001-04:00

Poor Chuck

2010-08-01T11:09:00.003-04:00

Abortions

2010-07-10T17:25:00.005-04:00

You Suck at Parking

2010-07-10T17:25:00.002-04:00

Conflict

2010-07-10T17:24:00.002-04:00

Clevage

2010-07-10T17:23:00.002-04:00

CDO

2010-07-10T17:22:00.002-04:00

Position with the C.I.A

2010-07-10T17:21:00.000-04:00

The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and tests were done there were three finalists — two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."

The first man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife." The agent replies, "Then you're not the right man for this job."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent replies, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

Finally, it was the woman's turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair!"

Women

2010-07-10T17:11:00.002-04:00

Virginity

2010-07-10T17:10:00.002-04:00

Ingenuity

2010-07-10T17:09:00.002-04:00

The King of /b/

2010-07-10T17:06:00.002-04:00